Choosing who will be your primary decision maker can be a difficult decision. This can be especially difficult if you have more than one child. Some parents choose their oldest child to take on this task, while others choose someone who is completely out of the family realm to avoid any future altercations between siblings.


Unfortunately, this decision can have the reverse effect as well, and siblings can become angry that their parents did not choose them to be a decision maker. In a situation where emotions can run high, how do you make the right decision for you?


When choosing your primary decision maker, you do not need to feel pressured to choose your oldest child. This is a decision that needs to be based on more things than fear of upsetting your children. The real question is what do you really need? Here are three characteristics that you should consider looking for in your primary decision maker:


  1. Trusted relationship. Trust is a must; choose someone who you know is dependable, and who knows your wishes well. This could be your oldest or youngest child, but for some this may be an aunt, uncle, family friend or advisor.


  1. Good decision maker. Choose someone who makes wise financial and health care decisions. Financial planning and decision making is a huge responsibility for whomever you choose, therefore you need to choose the best person for the job.  Consider also that there may be different people in your life for these roles. You may have someone who you know will make the best health care decisions for you but another person who you trust to manage and invest your finances.


  1. Commitment is a key characteristic you should look for in this person. It is crucial that your decision maker understands that your life is in his or her  hands, and he or she needs to be committed to making the best choices possible for your interest. The availability of this person should also be considered as your decision maker needs to be available all the time.


If you are having doubts about who your primary decision maker should be, now is the time to think it through. Do not feel restricted to choosing your children or being tied to only selecting your oldest child. You need to make the best decision for you, not for the feelings of others.


Does this article raise even more questions for you? We are here to answer them for you. Call us at (715) 843-5001 or contact us through our website to schedule an appointment with Attorney Alan Hougum.